Apparently, saying "Wow, you've grown since I last saw you" isn't deemed socially acceptable when said to adults.
Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful to have a job. I just wish it wasn't THIS job.
The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.
How are tornadoes and marriage alike? They both begin with a lot of sucking and blowing, and in the end you lose your house.
A diner complained, "Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!" His waiter replied, "That's entirely possible; our cook used to be a tailor."
How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus? At the circus, the clowns don't talk.
Life isn't about winning and losing. It's about wishing you would have won and wondering why you lost.
My husband is on the roof - only a few inches away from an insurance claim that could completely change my life.
That awkward moment when somebody is doing dishes and you put another dish in the sink.
Which runs faster, hot or cold? Hot. Everyone can catch cold.